I heard this conversation in a bar last night…or, as best as I could capture it…
- “No way in hell, buddy, no way in hell. We never went to the freakin’ moon; simply never happened, my friend. The whole thing was rigged. Can’t you remember? We were being owned by the Russians in the Space Race at the time and NASA had to do something mega to put it up to the Reds. So, they made it all up. It was faked. Yup, just like the government always does, they played us like dumb-ass fools.”
- “You’re damn right, man,” piped up another guy at the far side of the bar, whose hearing obviously worked but he had seemingly little else going on inside his head. “If we had actually been to the moon then why is it going to take us at least until 2020 to go back? I read somewhere that NASA said they had forgotten how to get there. Forgotten? Hah, that’s a bit rich seeing as we were never actually up there in the first place.”
- “Have you ever heard of the Van Halen radiation belt,” said the first lunar expert, spraying half his mouthful of beer on the counter as he did so.
I felt like interjecting at that stage to ask him if he meant the ‘Van Allen’ radiation belt, but thought best to stay out of it
“To get to the moon, I heard that those guys would have had to pass through that Van Halen belt thingy. Only one slight problem, though; if astronauts had actually travelled through it, they would have been fried – like pieces of KFC – so there’s no way in hell we could have sent them through it twice in a tin can and got them back home safely. It was all a massive hoax.”
I left at that point.
For obvious reasons.